You will know by now that I am all about being proactive and productive when it comes to tackling both issues of the home and of the heart. And yet,there are times when even the most proactive among us need to simply back away, recognize that we cannot control everything, let our shoulders rise in a grand and glorious ‘shrug,’ and let it all go.
I do believe that the “whatayagonnado” is quite different than giving up, however, and I want to make it a point to say that. Giving up implies failure, it implies the negative connotation of admitting defeat. Those are passive actions. In my mind, the power of the “whatayagonnado” is about actively deciding to stop investing your energy into a particular issue. It means that you have the option to continue worrying, fighting, pursuing an issue, but you have decided to instead come to peace with the way the cards have been played.
The trick is in being able to differentiate between when it’s time to keep fighting, and when it’s time to call it quits. And I’m afraid there is no specific answer for when or what this moment is. You have to feel it out for yourself. But here are a few questions to ask yourself that may be helpful in determining the answer:
– Can I still realistically accomplish whatever it is I set out to?
– Has it become damaging for me to continue on in my pursuit of this? (i.e. is it causing me unneeded stress, worry, grief, etc?)
– Am I still attached to whatever outcome I initially set out to accomplish? Or have I moved past it?
– Is there another (or other) cause(s) that are more deserving of my attention?
The whatayagonna do can be applied to matters as large as an entire relationship, or smaller ones like a lost cardigan. Either way, sometimes saying “whatayagonnado” can be just as powerful as upholding the battle.
This week, remind yourself that the “whatayagonnado” is at your full disposal. Use it as you see fit.